My Introduction as asked(N. Axel S.)

[A]

Hello,
My name is Nathaniel Axel S. Mr. Johnson knows me for some time and I have informed him some time ago that I am making an account in the forum.

As of now, I am 16 years old, living in Surabaya, in a family of uncertain religious belief(believe me, I don't even know exactly what the rest of my family believes), and a student in Cita Hati Christian School(an IB school, they have a website you can look up)

Speaking of my background, I was born in a "Christian" family. At the time I was born and up to a long time, I was in a family that attended a charismatic church, that did charismatic teachings. I kept being like that until I met the Reformed Evangelical Church of Indonesia(under Dr. Stephen Tong, which I disagree with), whom my mother decided to move to, and I thought at first that the "right teachings" were there, because plenty of what they teach made sense to me. However, at one point in time, I came across the website(on the article "Christian symbols that are not Christian") and for some reason I decided to explore the website even further for some reason, unlike some other websites whom I just took a look for that specific article and left. At first, if I remember correctly, I was something of what is termed a "god-fearer" or something like that, though I may not remember correctly. I thought I was saved at that point, but if I remember correctly, I just know "what is right", but it seems that I had never actually experienced repentance nor was I actually of Christ yet.
So practically during the time that I am referring to (I think Mr. Johnson might remember more of it than me) I was rather in "business as usual" and at some point, I, through randomness(the decision is left to God's providence, for nothing is truly random and God is the overseer) made some tasks that I promised God that I would do. So practically, maybe I was lazy, or maybe I put my self over God and ended up breaking the promise, and then making a new list of tasks and then breaking them again, and going on a cycle of sinful action(I think I did not care about God's commandments nor loved God as I was not saved at that point-though I think I am future-oriented). At that time, I decided to contact Mr. Johnson, (of whom I know of to be someone who fears the Lord God truly) and told him about it, and I also realized at that time that I never was actually saved in Christ as I had never repented as far as I know of. So I did as Mr Johnson advised me, I confessed my sin toward the Lord God and asked him to give me a repentant heart.
I  don't remember exactly everything that's happened, but starting from the point where I read his reply( at that time, If I remember correctly, sometime before I asked the Lord God to give me a repentant heart), I felt somewhat uneasy and I wanted to do the exact same things  that he wrote me about but I couldn't do them because I was in a public place until sometime later, and when I did, I did not feel sad or remorseful, I just felt empty(if I'm not wrong). Afterwards I committed some other sins again, and I confessed such things and ask for forgiveness to the Lord God, and I for some reason just started crying, but not for long, as I got interrupted. Sometime later, I thought I was just doing all those to serve myself(perhaps what I wanted was to profiteer from God to pursue whatever dreams I wanted, though I am not sure what I thought of it at the moment) and confessed such things  to the Lord God, and for some reason, I just sat in the dark crying or some time(I'm not sure what I was thinking of that time, but I just suddenly started doing that and all I could say was "God, I am a sinner, save me.." or something like that. ) So soon afterward, I picked up a KJV/AKJV bible(I think the only physical one I ever had) and tried reading it( the book of John, because it just came up on my mind) though I didn't exactly find out what I need to do to be saved after I had repented(what I know of was that I must convert to new habits, but which?). So I contacted Mr. Johnson again and I told him of it, so I found out about it, and on the 8th of March, I think I started to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ to save me and I think I have been saved ever since. At this point, I am still largely devoid of understanding so I still have a lot to learn(did the Bible not tell us to be children in evil and adults in understanding?), and though I am not sure whether I will ever have time to use this account or whether I will ever need to use it, but I am creating it just in case I ever want to or need to use it.

So anyway, Mr. Johnson knows about me, and there is quite a lot of conversation between the both of us.
So practically this is an introduction about me as asked, and I think I will stop writing for now.

[TheChickenWhisperer]

I think I might have gotten confused as I read through your testimony.  Did you repent in grief and Godly sorrow?  Chris does not teach to "believe in Jesus" to be saved but rather to repent.

[creationliberty]

Chris does not teach to "believe in Jesus" to be saved but rather to repent.

Yes, I do; you're giving people the impression that I don't teach faith in Christ. It's repentance and faith.

[A]

I think I definitely did repent and believe in the Lord Jesus at some point(repentance is a part of my story), though I am not sure whether I exactly explained that. I definitely did not intend to give people the impression that you mentioned about. If I did, then I apologize if I what I did was wrong(I still have a lot to learn...)

I just wish to clarify that I did go through repentance and faith in the Lord Jesus, that's what I assert to have gone through.

[A]

Of what I have written there in my first post on this topic, I just attempted to talk about myself in terms of my history(from that point until now, something like that), I meant to give out no offense or any impression that Mr. Johnson did not teach repentance and faith unto salvation, if I did so for any reason in the first post, I assert that I have gone through repentance and salvation, and I honestly don't know or expect it would turn out to be this way(the false impression that Ms. Tonya said)

If there is anything else, let me know personally or on this post, though I am not entirely sure whether I actually can post or reply due to several things that are going on in my life..

[A]

By the way, I am asking everyone who is willing to answer, am I truly of Christ, or am I just another false convert(who might end up? I already try examining myself daily(though I do not count how much I spend time on it) and I think I definitely am of Christ. Perhaps I am still wrong on a number of matters, I do not know.. Perhaps I still am unable to judge on righteous judgement.

[A]

I honestly do not know who even cares to read my posts, whether I am giving out the right idea that I want to explain, nor whether I am welcome here, but if I am not welcome to be on this forum for ANY reason whatsoever, like some other posts that I have read on the forums here, I am willing to be shown the door- I don't need to be forcefully banned.


Just a friendly statement, partially because I honestly do not know what goes on in the minds of everyone who reads my posts....

[anvilhauler]

I honestly do not know who even cares to read my posts, whether I am giving out the right idea that I want to explain, nor whether I am welcome here, but if I am not welcome to be on this forum for ANY reason whatsoever, like some other posts that I have read on the forums here, I am willing to be shown the door- I don't need to be forcefully banned.


Just a friendly statement, partially because I honestly do not know what goes on in the minds of everyone who reads my posts....

Hi Nathaniel

I certainly care to read your posts.  I guess you are in email contact with Chris and he might be helping you along.  At 16 yrs old you might only be at the age at which God will hold you accountable and so at this time it might be that you are truly getting on the right track for the way a life should be lived as God wishes all of us to. 

Hopefully if you do stay then the forum here will be a part of what builds you up on a sure and strong foundation.  Time always tells where people are really at and so you might not need to be too concerned about coming across wrong and not necessarily knowing all of the right things to say.  I'm sure others will have more communication with you.


Rgrds

Kevin

[Dee Babbitt]

Hi Nathaniel,

Thank you for posting your introduction, and telling us about yourself.  :-)

You are young, and it is wonderful that you are seeking God.  You will find kind people here, and the Truth.
This is a good place to be, where we can learn and grow stronger in our faith.

Welcome to the forum :-)

[creationliberty]

I meant to give out no offense or any impression that Mr. Johnson did not teach repentance and faith unto salvation

No, I was responding to Tonya. I modified my post so it included her quote so there is less confusion.

She said:

Chris does not teach to "believe in Jesus" to be saved but rather to repent.

I do teach that you need to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. I don't want others coming here and reading that, and thinking that I don't teach faith in Christ because that's not true. I teach that repentance and faith are requirements for the grace of God, and that He gives men both repentance (i.e. godly grief and sorrow) and faith, so they may acknowledge the truth and their spirits be washed clean by the blood of Christ.

Also Nathaniel, be patient. You made the post, and then it seemed like you were offended that no one was responding after 12 hours. Many people here have families, some have newborn children, and others have very demanding jobs. They'll get around to it in due time, just wait a bit.

[strangersmind]

Hello Nathaniel. You should consider as well we all do live in different parts of the world. So when it is ooo let's say your lunch time, it may be someone else midnight. I live in a 3rd world country at this time with unstable internet. So I may be able to read post but may struggle to send reply. Or some times I will read a post and reply later so it gives me time to think of what to say

[Jeanne]

Hi Nathaniel,

As long as you keep showing humility and a willingness to learn as you have done so far, you have no need to worry about getting kicked off the forum. It's when people come in here with and argumentative attitude and persist in expounding false doctrine that we show them the door.

So far as I can see here, no one has accused you of anything; they've simply asked questions to more clearly understand where you're coming from

In the last couple of posts, it sounds as if maybe you are now unsure as to whether you have repented or not. Have you read the articles on repentance and false converts on the CLE website?

https://http://www.creationliberty.com/articles/repent.php

https://http://www.creationliberty.com/articles/falseconverts.php

Only you can answer the questions you posed, but I would venture to guess that if you're worried about being a false convert, you're probably not.

Kevin, (anvilhauler), Billy (strangersmind) and I are the only ones who are even close to your time zone, so as was mentioned before, please have some patience with us and don't be offended if you don't get instantaneous answers to your posts.

[TheChickenWhisperer]

Yes, Thank you!  I was wrong and what Chris said is correct:  It IS repentance AND faith.  Forgive me for saying the wrong thing.

[Laura]

Welcome to the forum, Nathaniel! It's wonderful that you are so eager to learn and correspond with fellow Christians. I am quite busy taking care of my family and I am still learning and growing in my understanding, so I do a lot more reading than responding. Being patient is hard, especially when you are excited about the Lord! Take comfort in knowing you are in a good place here.

[Masha]

Hi Nathaniel, thank you for sharing your testimony. It is great that God reaches also the young people! I have 4 children so that is encouraging. I understand your eagerness, and even your impatience.
From your post "By the way, I am asking everyone who is willing to answer, am I truly of Christ, or am I just another false convert(who might end up? I already try examining myself daily(though I do not count how much I spend time on it) and I think I definitely am of Christ. Perhaps I am still wrong on a number of matters, I do not know.. Perhaps I still am unable to judge on righteous judgement."
(Im sorry I cannot manage to put the quote in like others do.)
I understood that you are asking other people to judge whether you are saved??IS that so?? If so I find that rather concerning as it does not depend on any man's opinion whether you are of God or not. It is between God and you, and you , alone, should be able to establish whether you are saved or not.
Repentance and faith is done within the privacy of some'ones heart.
My homebase is asking my attention again, and I cannot finish this post as I would like to, yet I do feel it is important to send you a WELCOME to this forum, and encourage you that I gladly read your posts and gladly respond. As I have a incredible chaotic bussy life, just as I am writing this, my child starts crying, I am accused of not replying carefully enough, and I apologise if I have misread your post. I hope to you this is an encouragement and a blessing. Welcome to the forum, I hope we can learn together and grow together in Christ.

[Jeanne]

I'm starting to wonder if Nathaniel didn't take offence at the fact that his posts weren't answered immediately and just leave. He hasn't logged back in since his last post a week ago.

[TheChickenWhisperer]

I feel really bad about saying the wrong thing.    I hope that wasn't what caused it.  I am glad Chris corrected me.  Maybe he will come back?  Things happen sometimes.

[anvilhauler]

I'm starting to wonder if Nathaniel didn't take offence at the fact that his posts weren't answered immediately and just leave. He hasn't logged back in since his last post a week ago.

I feel really bad about saying the wrong thing.    I hope that wasn't what caused it.  I am glad Chris corrected me.  Maybe he will come back?  Things happen sometimes.

He is quite likely one of those who was never going to stay anyway.  For him it was possibly just something to sign up to but with no afore thought of committment and doing something long term.  I doubt it is anything you wrote Tonya as a person does need a certain amount of resilience and it did cause a usual Christian discussion to come about and isn't that what it is to be a congregation and in discussion with eachother about doctrines etc.

[Mat Taos]

"He is quite likely one of those who was never going to stay anyway." I do understand the need to vet truly born again believers but the kid was 16.
Y'all do know what James 2:3 says right?

Might I suggest taking it down a notch with the new applicants? How do you expect baby believers to truly open up if y'all come at them regarding the first few words they write?

[Jeanne]

How were we coming after him? Chris replied to something Tonya said and Nathaniel thought it was aimed at him when it wasn't. Then he posted three times in quick succession, and left when we didn't answer him right away. He hasn't logged back in since 11 March when his last post was made, even though Kevin answered him just a little over an hour after his last post.