How I came to Christ

[Joshua Taylor]

Hello,

My name is Joshua Taylor.

I have a wife, and two children that I have been blessed with. We have about two and a half acres that, thankfully is paid off.
I have dedicated my life to Jesus when I was 15 with a repentant heart, sorrow for my sins, and willingness to follow Christ and his ways. Confessing with my mouth my inadequacy and acknowledging Chris paid for my sins and raised himself up on the third day. Knowing that he is the only way to heaven, I try to do better everyday. Not trying to do good for a reward but to hear my father say well done. I want to be one who pleases my creator, so i may talk and walk in his preaseance. His spirit in my life has such profound effects on my understanding and love for the lost and dying world. I am excited to learn more frome this church. I have been educated on a number of things that orthodox churches have taught incorrectly, some I knew but not to the depths that is revealed, and others that i was completely ignorant of.

Just to let this group known a little about me.

When I was born they said I would never talk right even if I could talk. Born with a web that held my tounge down.

When I was four years old and could barely talk, I had an experience that would set my life on a journey that I had no idea how would turn out.

     One afternoon, I was outside in the front yard alone, bieng 4 years old i heard a voice.
Whether an angel or a spirit or not I heard what I heard, the voice was clear, and audible. Joshua, it said, What Time Is It?
Frightened I ran. I ran into that home i lived to see if by chance my dad was where the voice cam from. It was interesting to say the least, my previous thought was correct. It was not my dad. He was sitting on his easy chair with my brothers pilled on his lap so that ther was no doubt he hadn't moved for quite some time. I can still remember what they were watching. Jungle book.
       This is not my conversion however it made it impossible to deny supernatural powers in my life from the beginning essentially.
        There were many things I was taught that wasn't true. I found out many while I was growing up. So many lies that almost everyone believe or was traditionally passing down. Inspite of the churches or pastoral leadership that was there not one person led me through the sinners prair, it was always missing the confession part of the salvation story. I was told only that I need to believe to be saved.  This was sad in my spirit and i knew something was missing, though at the time I didn't know what. One Wednesday evening an evangelist visited the church on a youth group night. The need for jesus was taught that night and I was geared up for the same empty message. This was different however. The evangelist asked who wanted to be saved, I did as I had before and signed for myself to be considered.
The evangelist came to my side and asked if I wanted to be saved, of course I do I thought. So as i was told to believe in Christ resurrection.. So far so good but its what everyone else had said. Waiting silently as the evangelist led me through more scripture based on repentance through the words of Paul. 
Romans 10.
9That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
So as I believed that christ was raised on the third day and with a repentant heart for the evil that continually faught for authority in my life, I confessed out loud Christ was to lead my life from this day forward, and my utter dependence on his power to make me as he wished. That was the day I submitted my will for his.
      At the end of these things was a powerful move by the spirit in me. An overwhelming love for all those people who where around me and all that is in this earth.
This love was new to me and so overwhelming I broke and sobbed on the shoulders of those who were not to embarrassed by my actions.

I was by no means a good person, but God...
He gave me a soft heart. At this point in my life I was sure to be an outcast at school.
I was mocked continually at school for any and all faults and failure. Home life was difficult as well, parents who divorced when I was 9. The dads I had were of no spiritual help. God alone is who cared for my salvation I learned. My learning came from my mother in that she brought me and my brothers to every church she was led to go to.
At 15 as a new believer i wanted to change the world for Christ. Remember I was ignorant of massive amounts of crucial information biblically.
When the opportunity rose I traveled to Tijuana Mexico, preaching Christ and him crucified.
What I saw there would change my life.
Yet another eye opener, the people had no grief for sin. Treading on our gifts as if they were inadequate. Truly a visual of an ungrateful generation.  That is when I realized, they were not receptive to us,  except for some older men.
On my return home I made an mental note to reach for those in my home town, why should I waste my time on those who blatantly reject the kindness we had shown.
So I did learn the scripture of the pearls before swine by living the lesson.

I had hardened my heart towards the world and become focused on myself, My blood brothers and my uncle who was only 9 months older than me. I was a poor guide for them as I had no leadership myself.

Struggling with drugs sex and alcohol like what seemed everyone else did. Hating myself for my sins and inability to remove the temptations, I spiraled into a quazi suicidal mentality. Satan using everything he could to make me unproductive to the lord, I came through with a new resolution, Jesus made me clean. My sins are in his hands, he forgave me. Christ forgave me and my self reflection became more clear than it had ever before. No longer was I relying on others to make me feel accepted. Christ accepted me, and that is what matters above all else. Yes im a sinner but not bound to it. Christ loving me in a way no one can compare. That is why I came through suicidal contimplations. He said to me
Life is a test Joshua, and how are you graded if you cheat? You fail. So he admonished me harshly for the thought of ending my life.
     The next chapter in my life would be of finding a woman siutable for a wife.
Many women i dated and ended the relationship before two weeks could endure.
The women had something missing in them.
I didn't know why it was so hard to find a godly woman. So I gave up so to speak.
I submitted that thing to Christ and asked for his help in that i confess i cannot find one alone but am unable to do it entirely.
So as time passed there was a time when I was called to a house. It was interesting that the lord spoke to my heart in such a place. Sin everywhere, and planns for it.
He quickly shared with me who among the people was my promised wife. God cautioned me that i must hold my peace concerning him and his decision for her, as she knew nothing of his planning and he let me know this. Holding the matter to my heart I visited her and talking and sharing time with her.
One day I asked if she believes in Jesus, she said she did. This was one of the things that brought us together, kept us together and ultimately led to her true conversion.

Many other things are to be said about my life and the walk I have had with the lord, but it is sufficient that this be my confession of faith.

[Joshua Taylor]

This is to expound on my previous testimony. I am a poor man for words even though I try so hard to say what has transformed my life. There is so much to tell from my heart to this church I have been introduced to.
    Like Moses I have a difficult time explaining everything I want to in order to show anyone the way I see and understand. I have both came to Christ and have came back to Christ as a prodigal son. I have believed in man until he failed me and left me desolate, but God has had pity on me for my utter wretchedness and faulty thinking. So I believe he let them fail me so I would rely on him only.
As a small child I was taught to believed in his power and fear him, I hadn't learned anything about forgiveness though. I was sorry for my sins and needed more. Something was missing and I could tell.
Even the evil spirits believe he is the messiah. The difference is that they feel no sorrow for what they have done. No shame.

  As a young boy I had been to many churches by the time I was 9 and many more after.
This year was not the most important, although it had profound effects for the foundation of my spiritual life.
This was the year my parents divorced.
After we moved, i had a hunger for truth in my life. I knew I was a sinner and bound for hell. I hated the evil in my life that I kept fighting, I had overwhelming sorrow for what I seemed helpless to continue doing. I could not break this cycle of sin no matter how hard I tried.  The next year's of my life I spent many evenings at an alter praying for salvation. I knew I was a sinner. I would stay at the altar from the altar call till they would close the church somtimes. On a fiew occasions I was dragged from the altar as they thought I was sleeping i had been there praying for so long. I wanted help but all I knew was lord save me a sinner. How is it I was raised in church and never heard about Jesus yet? Only he'll and damnation. At 15 i had become frustrated with the churches and almost gave up hope I would ever be saved. How can I stop this cycle of evil all around me and on my lips and in my heart. It seemed to surround me continually.
Then there was a day when Christ saved me.
He sent a messenger to the church we had been going to. The sermon on repentance, I had longed for and ultimately showed me the way.
  I needed free and wanted desperately to have this evil out of me. Like a leach that wont let go. The more i pulled on my own, the more I bled. But when I asked Christ for his forgiveness for my sins, believing he who had the power to raise up fom death could bring my soul out of the bondage of the sin I was in. I asked him to help me to turn from evil and to free me from this sin. This was in my heart  when i confessed in the audience of my pears that I was a sinner, asking for his forgiveness, believing he has the power to forgive sins, and asking him to guide my life.
 I have had many hard battles of this flesh that tears to do evil. I am still an ignorant sinner saved by our lord Christ. When he brings those sins to my attention I am calling on his name to forgive me and to help me do them no more.  There were times i felt like I was endangering my soul in the very crowds i was with. I shared Jesus with the people I was friends with, although i fear that i made the gospel of none effect for on an small number of occasion I would have a alcohol with them. It was an offense to my spirit and to God. I asked for his help and to my relief, it was easy to leave this sin.
A harder sin to leave was that of tobacco.
By the time I had decided to quit tobacco age 15, to the time I had quit falling into the temptations of tobacco, age 21 was a longer journey. There is so much more to my heart than words are able to expound on. I am a man who is trying to describe an indescribable thing that is spiritual and there are no words that can give justice to how much I love our creator. Not a word that can describe the remorse for my sin.
No words to show you the great forgiveness for my soul that I have received.

In this I confess i did not go into great detail in my earlier testimony. I had such sorrow in remembrance of who I was, and the things I remembered, I was weeping continually. In this I apologize, i do not want anyone to misunderstand my conversion. I feel sorrow for evil as he has taken this heart of stone and given me a heart of flesh that loves people and cares for the soul.

[MeganIA]

Hi Joshua,

I don't want to leave you waiting on any type of response to your posts. I am just struggling to wrap my head around the order of events you shared. I want to better understand what you are trying to convey.

Struggling with drugs sex and alcohol like what seemed everyone else did. Hating myself for my sins and inability to remove the temptations, I spiraled into a quazi suicidal mentality. Satan using everything he could to make me unproductive to the lord, I came through with a new resolution, Jesus made me clean. My sins are in his hands, he forgave me. Christ forgave me and my self reflection became more clear than it had ever before. No longer was I relying on others to make me feel accepted. Christ accepted me, and that is what matters above all else. Yes im a sinner but not bound to it. Christ loving me in a way no one can compare. That is why I came through suicidal contimplations. He said to me

Is this describing you before or after 15?

By the time I had decided to quit tobacco age 15, to the time I had quit falling into the temptations of tobacco, age 21 was a longer journey. There is so much more to my heart than words are able to expound on. I am a man who is trying to describe an indescribable thing that is spiritual and there are no words that can give justice to how much I love our creator. Not a word that can describe the remorse for my sin.
No words to show you the great forgiveness for my soul that I have received.

Is there something that happened when you were 21?

[Joshua Taylor]

As stated before, we are all sinners and fall short of Gods glory. Through faith we are saved not of works lest any should boast, but works do come as fruits of the faith.
A righteous man will fall 7 times but rise again!
We are all human, but yesuah lifts us up out of our depraved state and imparts himself within us. Again he who endure to the end shall be saved. Taking our cross daily, submitting our flesh to the lord and his ways.
You will be tempted, and tribulations will come, but he that is within has provided a way out of temptations. So look for his door of opportunities to flee from the evil of this world.
Read and study to show thyself approved.

[creationliberty]

Okay Josh, I can't stay silent anymore because you totally ignored the very simple questions Megan asked you, and your response was quite similar to how a politician might vaguely respond to questions they don't like. It amazed me that you stated that you were a "poor man for words," and yet, you keep trying to write in some poetic manner instead of just addressing simple questions and speaking plainly.

Frankly, something is really odd about what you wrote in this thread, and I am not sure I can put my finger on exactly what it is, but I guarantee that you do not talk to people like this on a daily basis, which indicates to me that what you are writing here is covering something, and as much as I want to give someone the charitable benefit of the doubt, it is very difficult for me to do so in this situation because I am struggling to understand what you are saying.

Your first introduction post seemed to gloss over repentance of sin, and then later, you seemed to indicate that your tears were of joy, not of sorrow. Then, when you wrote another post to try and clarify some things, it made me more confused than I was with the first post. Now, under normal circumstances, I would just say nothing and try to give you the benefit of the doubt that you just write poorly, but when someone asks you a simple question about how old you were when something happened, and you answer with "A righteous man will rise again!" and "Study to show thyself approved!" then I become very cautious because that goes more along the lines of manipulation rather than testimony, meaning that it seems to me that you are attempting to give all of us an impression of yourself you want us to believe, rather than giving a open testimony of Christ because you are nervous we might see something you don't want us to see.

I am obviously not the only person on this forum who was confused and found your testimony odd, otherwise, more people would have responded, as you can see if you check out other testimonies on this forum. I cannot think of anything else to say right now because your three posts altogether have left me cautious about what it is you really believe.

[Joshua Taylor]

I believe in one way to heaven that is through Christ.
I believe in the spirit of God.
I believe that the most righteous man is still evil in the eyes of god for it is as a filthy rag.
I believe in the resurrection of Christ on the third day.
I believe in the redemption power Christ fulfilled on the cross as he shed his blood, a sacrifice for the sins of all who are his.
I believe there is one way to be saved. Through confession to Christ of our sins and believing in his resurrection power.

[Joshua Taylor]

I am waiting for you Chris. You shouldn't be so shy. Ask me anything. I will even talk to you on the phone.

[anvilhauler]

I am waiting for you Chris. You shouldn't be so shy. Ask me anything. I will even talk to you on the phone.

Rather than wanting to talk to Chris on the phone, why don't you just write the answers to any questions in the forum?  The church here is more than just one person and everyone in the church would maybe like to know where you're coming from. 

I find your communications to be very strange too but no-one here is eager just to write you off without giving you lots of opportunity to make yourself clear.

[Joshua Taylor]

Thank you for your comment,
I am waiting for the questions.

[Timothy]

I am waiting for the questions.

Joshua, I had wanted to try to give a response to your introduction too but I just couldn't figure out what to say. But Megan asked you a couple of questions that you didn't answer so that's something you can respond to.

Your first introduction post seemed to gloss over repentance of sin, and then later, you seemed to indicate that your tears were of joy, not of sorrow.

Chris pointed this out to you and I was interested in what you have to say because you didn't address it in your response to him. What do you say repentance is and how is it that you came to repentance? You mentioned having a repentant heart, but I'm still unsure what you say repentance is and the story about how you came to that point. Can you explain this in more detail?

I believe there is one way to be saved. Through confession to Christ of our sins and believing in his resurrection power.

Another thing is that you mentioned that confession was part of the gospel and you mentioned confession several times in your testimony. Although confessing your sins to God is a good thing, it is not repentance and faith in Christ so I'm not understanding why you're bringing confession of sins as part of the gospel. Jesus Christ and the apostles laid out the gospel clearly.

Mark 1:15 And saying, The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand: repent ye, and believe the gospel.

Acts 20:21Testifying both to the Jews, and also to the Greeks, repentance toward God, and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ.

Can you also explain this to us?

[Joshua Taylor]

First I want to appologize for reacting in the manner I did.
I am human and am so weak, I'm way to easily on a stance of guarding my heart against being hurt again.
Please accept my apology? I didn't understand that the questions were sencere. My past experiences still are a stumbling block to me, and God is helping me se more every day. He brought it to my thoughts and I felt sorrow for my anger I reacted with. For this to, I apologize, i have asked his forgiveness and I ask this church to forgive me as well.
I will address those questions one post at a time, if its ok with the church.
 I will be posting these responses soon after prayer.
If the Lord tarries.

[Timothy]

No worries and take your time to respond if you need. It is fine if you answer them one at a time.

[Jeanne]

Josh, first of all I want to say that it has been an absolute joy to have your wife, Heather as part of this forum and also part of our church group. Her humility and eagerness to learn and do what is pleasing to the Lord Jesus Christ is very evident and it's very refreshing to see. On the other hand, it has been very hard to figure out where you're coming from. Forgive me if I'm misinterpreting, but it seems to me that you are trying more to impress us. What anyone here thinks of you should be the least of your worries, as the only opinion that truly matters is what the Lord Jesus Christ thinks.

Jeremiah 17:9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?

1 Samuel 16:7 for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.

1 Corinthians 10:7 7 Do ye look on things after the outward appearance? If any man trust to himself that he is Christ's, let him of himself think this again, that, as he is Christ's, even so are we Christ's.

[Joshua Taylor]

How can one confess Christ who hasn't believed?
Even this doesn't save you. again, to tremble before our creator for his glory revealed all our iniquity.  This doesn't save a man. But had faith not brought the fear, because one cannot fear any he doesn't believe, fear would not have brought the deep penatrating agony of our sins. It however  is not salvation. But commitment to the father ones life to guide hime on the foundation of these principles are our faith. Not of works alone. Not of sorrow for our flesh tearing at the spiritual discipline we yearn for. But of our love for him above all others and in turn as he has loved us so we have joy unspoken in the spirit to comfort us for the sins we have committed are grevios to us in our memories. So he has loved us and we in turn love others insomuch that we are compelled to share his love.
This is how you will know them for the love they have one for another.
Howbeit he didnt say of sorrow? Of work? Of faith?
So Paul even considered it. He said we are a tinkling symbol if we have all gifts but lack love. Love produces charity in a giving sense but the charity of ones heart is love.
Please give me time to adress some more issues. Considering this is one of many to come.

[Joshua Taylor]

Meagan on your first quote. The answer is that this happened after 15.

[creationliberty]

How can one confess Christ who hasn't believed?
Even this doesn't save you. again, to tremble before our creator for his glory revealed all our iniquity.  This doesn't save a man. But had faith not brought the fear, because one cannot fear any he doesn't believe, fear would not have brought the deep penatrating agony of our sins. It however  is not salvation. But commitment to the father ones life to guide hime on the foundation of these principles are our faith. Not of works alone. Not of sorrow for our flesh tearing at the spiritual discipline we yearn for. But of our love for him above all others and in turn as he has loved us so we have joy unspoken in the spirit to comfort us for the sins we have committed are grevios to us in our memories. So he has loved us and we in turn love others insomuch that we are compelled to share his love.
This is how you will know them for the love they have one for another.
Howbeit he didnt say of sorrow? Of work? Of faith?
So Paul even considered it. He said we are a tinkling symbol if we have all gifts but lack love. Love produces charity in a giving sense but the charity of ones heart is love.
Please give me time to adress some more issues. Considering this is one of many to come.

Finally. It took almost a month to get this out of you. Now I see what the problem is, and now I know why you are trying to write in a sanctimonious tone instead of just speaking plainly with us: You do not believe in repentance as we do.

For those of you who may not have caught it, let me quote the key section:

fear would not have brought the deep penatrating agony of our sins. It however  is not salvation. But commitment to the father ones life to guide hime on the foundation of these principles are our faith. Not of works alone. Not of sorrow for our flesh tearing at the spiritual discipline we yearn for. But of our love for him above all others and in turn as he has loved us so we have joy unspoken in the spirit to comfort us for the sins we have committed are grevios to us in our memories.

So Josh is now continuing to speak in his feigned poetic manner, even though he already said he is "a poor man for words," which is still a contradiction and deceitful. That being said, let's walk through this step by step.

He says that fear of God has made us agonize over our sin, but then says that is not salvation. Of course it isn't because Jesus Christ is salvation, as His name, Jesus, means salvation. No one here has ever said "repentance is salvation," but rather repentance is a condition for salvation that is given to us.

In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth;
-2Ti 2:25

In agreement with this, Josh says, " It[,] however[,] is not salvation. But commitment to the father [in] one[']s life to guide hime [him] on the foundation of these principles are [is] our faith," which means Josh believes in a very similar principle to the Catholic Church, in that he believe that it takes faith and works combined to gain his salvation. Notice specifically that after he said that agonizing over sin (which I took to mean sorrow for one's sin) is not enough (and I agree), he then said the "commitment to the father" is a necessary condition for salvation, and that is not what the Bible teaches us.

For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.
-Eph 2:8-9

Then opened he their understanding, that they might understand the scriptures, And said unto them, Thus it is written, and thus it behoved Christ to suffer, and to rise from the dead the third day: And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.
-Luke 24:45-47

In case that wasn't enough, Josh goes on to try to save himself from being called out on this, but his next sentence gives it away: "Not of works alone." If he had said, "Not of works," and stopped the sentence there, we would just be left in confusion to the previous sentence, but the fact that he meaningfully added in the word 'alone' gave it all away. He believes that there is some work involved in earning salvation, otherwise, you will not get it, and that right there brings all his confusing posts into the light to make sense of them.

His works-based doctrine now explains to me why his posts were so sporadic and confusing, why he seemed to be speaking a sanctimonious, poetic tone, even though he is a "poor man for words," why he would post Scripture with no explanation in another thread, why he had to go "pray" just to answer a question about how old he was at a certain point in his testimony, and why he seems to be so fearful among us. Josh was desperately trying to find every way he could to poetically scream out "GLORY TO JESUS!" to try to fool us, hoping that we would not ask him about his foundational beliefs, and just accept him without requiring him to confess what he truly believes.

Josh then solidifies what I am saying by going on to say, "Not of sorrow for our flesh tearing at the spiritual discipline we yearn for. But of our love for him," which creates two more problems. First, he rejects the doctrine that godly sorrow has any part of saving grace, and instead says that we only need to "love God." The majority of Jews "love God," and the majority of Catholics "love Jesus," but an overwhelming majority of them will end up in hell.

Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.
-Mat 7:13-14

The second problem is that he also denies the doctrine that no man seeks after God on his own, meaning that no one is sitting around saying, "Oh, when will God give me this sorrow that I long for so I can have good spiritual discipline?"

What then? are we better than they? No, in no wise: for we have before proved both Jews and Gentiles, that they are all under sin; As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one. Their throat is an open sepulchre; with their tongues they have used deceit; the poison of asps is under their lips: Whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness: Their feet are swift to shed blood: Destruction and misery are in their ways: And the way of peace have they not known: There is no fear of God before their eyes.
-Romans 3:10-18

The Spirit of God must come to them in their broken state to open their eyes, which He does by the hearing of His Word, whether preached or read:

So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.
-Romans 10:17

When the Spirit of God comes to a man, He gives that man repentance (i.e. godly sorrow of his wrongdoing) and faith (trust in Christ's shed blood), and through those gifts, that man is redeemed unto eternal life. That is NOT what Josh believes because Josh chooses to believe that he has to do works to earn that place, and that means he believes in a false gospel, and sadly, it also means he believes in a different "jesus" than the Jesus Christ of the Bible.

Josh, to me, it sounds like the true conversion of your wife has shaken you to your core. That's a good thing. Since you wanted to quote those verses about marriage in another thread (even though you did not even bother to give a chapter/book reference where you got them from), let me quote a couple of those verses back to you:

And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
-1 Corinthians 7:13-14

As I said to you in the other thread, "I believe your responses to us are covering for something you do not want us to see, and I don't know what it is yet, but I will patient because, as God has always done, He will show me in due time if you keep talking." It's sad that it took a month for your to say these things, and next time, it would be better to speak plainly with everyone so we do not have to waste so much time. Personally, I do not believe you have been born again in Christ; I think you have been playing church for many years because you have put your faith into your experiences, and therefore, you are trying to interpret the Word of God by your experiences, rather than faithfully adapting to His doctrines, and that is why there is disconnect between you and our church.

I will try to remember to pray for Heather, that God would be merciful to her and give her the discernment she needs to be a faithful mother in your household.

[Joshua Taylor]

Chris, you seem to miss what I say continually.
You have also twisted many of my statments.
Let me clarify this for you sence you have a hard time understanding me.
It took God calling us to him by the spirit, none come to the father except the spirit drawl him.
It took believing in the father son and spirit to bring one into repentance( sorrow). Though it is not worldy sorrow, world sorrow is sorry because of punishment but Godly sorrow is sorrow for sin indeed.
It took faith in Christ Jesus that he is the only way. He paid for our sins on the cross. With his blood he paid our debt. He rose on the third day. He interceedes for us.
(Not of works alone) works are a fruit of love.
If you believe and have no works that are friut for repentance, then it is a cause for concern.
If you do all this and are driven by your own agenda, you still haven't committed your life to his purpose.
I ask you why you are hear?
It is for his pleasure we were made.
He wants us all to come to him.
Christ is our savior, and I follow the father through the instructions of the son with the guidance of the spirit.
Is this not the gospel I have repeatedly stated in detail.
Look at my statments again. Can you not see.

[Joshua Taylor]

These are Jesus words

Luke 13


5 I tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish.

6 He spake also this parable; A certain man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard; and he came and sought fruit thereon, and found none.

7 Then said he unto the dresser of his vineyard, Behold, these three years I come seeking fruit on this fig tree, and find none: cut it down; why cumbereth it the ground?

8 And he answering said unto him, Lord, let it alone this year also, till I shall dig about it, and dung it:

9 And if it bear fruit, well: and if not, then after that thou shalt cut it down.

10 And he was teaching in one of the synagogues on the sabbath.

We se in this parable that God expected fruit to come or he was going to cut it down.

Luke 19:16-28 King James Version (KJV)
16 Then came the first, saying, Lord, thy pound hath gained ten pounds.

17 And he said unto him, Well, thou good servant: because thou hast been faithful in a very little, have thou authority over ten cities.

18 And the second came, saying, Lord, thy pound hath gained five pounds.

19 And he said likewise to him, Be thou also over five cities.

20 And another came, saying, Lord, behold, here is thy pound, which I have kept laid up in a napkin:

21 For I feared thee, because thou art an austere man: thou takest up that thou layedst not down, and reapest that thou didst not sow.

22 And he saith unto him, Out of thine own mouth will I judge thee, thou wicked servant. Thou knewest that I was an austere man, taking up that I laid not down, and reaping that I did not sow:

23 Wherefore then gavest not thou my money into the bank, that at my coming I might have required mine own with usury?

24 And he said unto them that stood by, Take from him the pound, and give it to him that hath ten pounds.

25 (And they said unto him, Lord, he hath ten pounds.)

26 For I say unto you, That unto every one which hath shall be given; and from him that hath not, even that he hath shall be taken away from him.

27 But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.
 

Jesus expected return for his investment. He bought us at a price. 

Proverbs 16:3 Context

1The preparations of the heart in man, and the answer of the tongue, is from the LORD. 2All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the LORD weigheth the spirits. 3Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established. 4The LORD hath made all things for himself: yea, even the wicked for the day of evil. 5Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD: though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished. 6By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD men depart from evil.



 

[Joshua Taylor]

This is the scripture I was quoting that you were dissatisfied with

James 2:14-24
King James Version
14 What doth it profit, my brethren, though a man say he hath faith, and have not works? can faith save him?

15 If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food,

16 And one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what doth it profit?

17 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.

18 Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.

19 Thou believest that there is one God; thou doest well: the devils also believe, and tremble.

20 But wilt thou know, O vain man, that faith without works is dead?

21 Was not Abraham our father justified by works, when he had offered Isaac his son upon the altar?

22 Seest thou how faith wrought with his works, and by works was faith made perfect?

23 And the scripture was fulfilled which saith, Abraham believed God, and it was imputed unto him for righteousness: and he was called the Friend of God.

24 Ye see then how that by works a man is justified, and not by faith only

[Timothy]

Joshua, I tried rereading your initial introduction with the understanding that what you believe is a works based gospel and things started to make more sense. I'm starting to see more clearly what it is you were saying before. But before I go there, I want to point out that you defended your works salvation in response to Chris so that it proves that you didn't just make a mistake in typing this.

It took faith in Christ Jesus that he is the only way. He paid for our sins on the cross. With his blood he paid our debt. He rose on the third day. He interceedes for us.
(Not of works alone) works are a fruit of love.
If you believe and have no works that are friut for repentance, then it is a cause for concern.

Although Christians who are born again do, at some point, bring fruits of repentance after they are saved those fruits are not what saves us. In one sentence you will say it is Christ's blood that pays our debt, then you will contradict yourself and say that salvation is "not of works alone." You cannot have that both ways.

This is from your first post:

I have dedicated my life to Jesus when I was 15 with a repentant heart, sorrow for my sins, and willingness to follow Christ and his ways. Confessing with my mouth my inadequacy and acknowledging Chris[t] paid for my sins and raised himself up on the third day.

I have always been confused when people say that they "dedicate their life to Jesus" because I don't actually know what that means. But from what little I understand from it is that dedicating your life to Jesus is not the gospel that Jesus or his apostles preached. As I had pointed out before, one must repent of their sin (have godly sorrow of their sin towards God) and believe in Jesus Christ and that His sacrifice on the cross is payment for our sins. It's that simple. When you start saying that you "dedicated your life to Jesus", this is actually implying that you are putting your faith in doing good works from that point on instead of the finished work of Christ and with this new understanding of what you believe, it starts to make sense. This is partly why I couldn't understand half of what you were saying before, becuase you use phrases like that that church-goers typically use who have no understanding of what they actually believe.

What also confused me is this about the evangelist you mentioned:

There were many things I was taught that wasn't true. I found out many while I was growing up. So many lies that almost everyone believe or was traditionally passing down. Inspite of the churches or pastoral leadership that was there not one person led me through the sinners prair, it was always missing the confession part of the salvation story. I was told only that I need to believe to be saved.  This was sad in my spirit and i knew something was missing, though at the time I didn't know what. One Wednesday evening an evangelist visited the church on a youth group night. The need for jesus was taught that night and I was geared up for the same empty message. This was different however. The evangelist asked who wanted to be saved, I did as I had before and signed for myself to be considered.
The evangelist came to my side and asked if I wanted to be saved, of course I do I thought. So as i was told to believe in Christ resurrection.. So far so good but its what everyone else had said.

Before I had thought that you felt something missing from the gospel they were preaching because they were leaving out repentance. But it was also confusing because you were saying that they were leaving out the "confession part of the salvation story." That was odd to me and that was the reason I had asked you about that before. Either way, you were saying that faith was insufficient for you and this becomes clearer in the next section.

Waiting silently as the evangelist led me through more scripture based on repentance through the words of Paul.
Romans 10.
9That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
So as I believed that christ was raised on the third day and with a repentant heart for the evil that continually faught for authority in my life, I confessed out loud Christ was to lead my life from this day forward, and my utter dependence on his power to make me as he wished. That was the day I submitted my will for his.

First of all, you said that the evangelist told you about repentance in Romans 10:9-10. These verses are not really describing anything about repentance in themselves and so it was confusing why you were quoting these. But then you mentioned that you "confessed out loud" Christ. Although it's not a bad thing, you keep emphasizing saying a specific thing (doing something other than believing) is part of salvation. We don't put our faith in saying certain things because it is faith in Jesus Christ that cleanses us from our sins. Christians will confess Christ automatically, but that confession, or saying out loud they believe in Christ or dedicate themselves to Him, is not what saves anyone. Many will say Lord, Lord (confessing Christ is their Lord) but they will be sent to the lake of fire.

Matthew 7:22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

You also said that you confessed, specifically, that "Christ was to lead my life from this day forward...That was the day I submitted my will for his." You're bringing up "dedication to Jesus" as part of the gospel and based on what you have responded to us is that that "dedication" is your dedication to do good works from that point on. Hopefully people are starting to see how that you are not really putting your faith in Jesus Christ's work on the cross, but your own works. This is why when those people preached faith to you before it was not good enough for you, not because they didn't preach repentance as well, but because they didn't teach that you had to work your way into heaven by "dedicating your life" to Jesus.

This is why you brought up James 2 to justify your statement "not of works alone." James 2 is not saying that anyone is born again by works because that would blatantly contradict other Scripture. Rather, it is describing that those with true faith do works because of their faith. James even explains it using Abraham as an example when he offered Isaac as a sacrifice to God.

James 2:21 Was not Abraham our father justified by works, when he had offered Isaac his son upon the altar?
22 Seest thou how faith wrought with his works, and by works was faith made perfect?
23 And the scripture was fulfilled which saith, Abraham believed God, and it was imputed unto him for righteousness: and he was called the Friend of God.
24 Ye see then how that by works a man is justified, and not by faith only.

The work that Abraham did in offering Isaac (even though God had stopped him before he actually did the act and brought them a ram to offer instead) despite knowing that God had already promised Abraham that Isaac was his heir, was a result of his faith in God that God would keep his promise no matter what happened. That work showed Abraham's faith outwardly and proved that he believed God.

This is why it says in verse 24 that he was justified by works and not by faith only, not because he had been born again, but that the works was the evidence of his faith. James is explaining this in context that Christians are not to have respect of persons.

1 My brethren, have not the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with respect of persons.
2 For if there come unto your assembly a man with a gold ring, in goodly apparel, and there come in also a poor man in vile raiment;
3 And ye have respect to him that weareth the gay clothing, and say unto him, Sit thou here in a good place; and say to the poor, Stand thou there, or sit here under my footstool:
4 Are ye not then partial in yourselves, and are become judges of evil thoughts?
5 Hearken, my beloved brethren, Hath not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom which he hath promised to them that love him?
6 But ye have despised the poor. Do not rich men oppress you, and draw you before the judgment seats?
7 Do not they blaspheme that worthy name by the which ye are called?
8 If ye fulfil the royal law according to the scripture, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself, ye do well:
9 But if ye have respect to persons, ye commit sin, and are convinced of the law as transgressors.
10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
11 For he that said, Do not commit adultery, said also, Do not kill. Now if thou commit no adultery, yet if thou kill, thou art become a transgressor of the law.
12 So speak ye, and so do, as they that shall be judged by the law of liberty.
13 For he shall have judgment without mercy, that hath shewed no mercy; and mercy rejoiceth against judgment.
14 What doth it profit, my brethren, though a man say he hath faith, and have not works? can faith save him?
15 If a brother or sister be naked, and destitute of daily food,
16 And one of you say unto them, Depart in peace, be ye warmed and filled; notwithstanding ye give them not those things which are needful to the body; what doth it profit?
17 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone.

Hopefully this is beginning to make better sense to other Christians why Joshua's speech was so confusing.