I want to start by sharing that I appreciate Chris' article,
Feminism: Satan's Plan to Destroy Your Family. This is a well-needed warning that most churches ignore because they are seeker-friendly, gathering "captive silly women" (2 Timothy 3:6) and even a few women who mean well, while trying to persuade them to give tithes and offering, as they influence most of the financial decisions. Chris is also one of the very few men out there to support God's institution of marriage while denouncing feminism. I have had a multitude of ministries teaching "save sex for marriage" during my youth, but I recall no instance of them rebuking worldly traditions, whether the wedding looks like a club or involves unbiblical rituals. These ministries treat relationships and sex too lightly, and fail to teach biblical gender roles. I'm glad for Bible-loving alternatives like Creation Liberty.
What I would like to talk about, and what concerns me, is an online movement known as MGTOW. It stands for Men Going Their Own Way, and it represents men believing that relationships/commitments to women are not worth it. Practically none of them endorse marriage in any form. Instead, they are either pick-up artists (they generally date women for a short time at minimal cost, as they only want sex; some of them visit prostitutes), or they live as MGTOW Monks by completely abstaining from sex. Neither of these is appealing to me compared to biblical marriage, but at the same time, biblical marriage is nearly extinct in today's world. (Note: MGTOW generally distances itself from LGBTQ.)
Here are just some of the reasons why MGTOW advocates against marriage:
- No-fault divorce, initiated by women ~7 times out of 10, can happen at any time, even to the kindest men. If so, men often pay alimony, child support and lawyers.
- No-fault divorce often grows into women looking for "fault" in ex-husbands to maximize settlements. This can even lead to false allegations of abuse.
- The divorce process would not only hurt children, but oftentimes, it would also leave the dad with little to no custody for his children.
- Okay, so let's assume no divorce happens. Women are the major spenders in America, while men are the major earners. That's a lot of faith to put in women's choices.
- Speaking of which, the average wedding day costs tens of thousands of dollars. The wedding and divorce industries each earned over US$50 billion in any recent year.
- In most marriages, men get the least appealing parts of the home (such as the garage, attic or "man cave") while women and children decorate and enjoy the rest.
- Appliances (toasters, washers, dryers, vacuums, etc.) replace much of the labour (slow cooking, cleaning by hand, etc.) traditionally done by women in the old days.
- Men are told by "purity groups" that they get the "best sex" with marriage. The truth is, studies give no clear consensus. Plus, "purity" campaigns can make sex feel dirty.
- The idea of "love" is little more than a marketing technique by big businesses like Disney and Hollywood. Relying on their definition of love is absolutely foolish.
- Despite numerous purity campaigns like BarlowGirl and Promise Keepers, most "churches" fail to properly address biblical marriage, especially in terms of men's needs.
These are just 10 reasons that come to my mind. There are certainly many more reasons to reject worldly marriage, some which are also mentioned in Chris' feminism article.
One key acronym discussed in MGTOW circles is NAWALT, meaning Not All Women Are Like That. Most MGTOW men disagree with that acronym, using AWALT instead. Personally, do I believe there are NAWALTs (women that are exceptional) out there? Yes. (Please note: some may disagree with Creation Liberty.) Here are my examples:
Looking locally and in the world at large, though, women like them are rare. The video
"Not all" admits the exception by huMAN (caution: he cusses, as do many MGTOW) explains this quite well: the idea of NAWALT implies that
most women are unsuitable when it comes to a healthy man-woman relationship. There is even a video by Sunrise Hoodie (whom I
believe is a Christian) called "
MGTOW - The Proverbs 31 Wife | The Bible's NAWALT?" that simply further validates how rare the Proverbs 31 wife is. Certainly, verses like Genesis 2:18 show that women are to help men and be a blessing from God, but aside from the aforementioned exceptions, I almost never witnessed such women in my life. Past churches I attended did not teach the full truth on biblical marriage - the joys, the pains and how to stay strong in Christ. Thus, I now find myself single today.
None of this is meant to discourage any godly women who truly love the Lord Jesus Christ and His Word, the King James Bible in English or an equivalent in other languages. These are simply my observations after spending over a decade with purity groups, being told "trust in God and He will provide" by false ministries that erred from the faith. Having a bad experience with BarlowGirl, noticing their leaven and how their claims of purity were little more than a marketing gimmick, eventually led me to discover MGTOW. Most churches and ministries today are lukewarm, and feminist. To keep members comfortable, they won't even dare mention MGTOW, let alone compare it to the Word of God. That's why I'm hoping to hear a biblical perspective from the men and women at Creation Liberty. In light of a world that constantly attacks biblical manhood, what's a man to do? (Feel free to ask for sources for my data. I've used French guillemets in my original post, but the forum ate my post after the guillements, so I axed them and used italics instead.)
